Dam dams

Well today was a get stuff sorted kind of day. At our place we have taken shares in ikea and put in a heap of cheap 'made by a 15yr old called chinese kid named Chan' type shelving. Today me and the misses routed a heap of cable through all the shelving to make it all work and had it working like a charm about an hour ago. Im tired but it works.

In my shelves there is this network of cables, all hidden running rough the whole system, keeping everything functioning and working. Without power the printers won't work, without network cables the router won't work. They have pathways that information and power travel down and up.

For me I have channels or flows that keep me going. My main feeder, the biggest one with the most power and info running in it is my prayer life. Reflecting today I realized that i have let it fill with crap. Loads of it, dams run up and down this channel to God. Stuff gets in the way and things collect and stop the flow.

I imagine myself looking over it in a helicopter, assessing the damage and calling the occasional state emergency to clear it and dredge the rubbish away. I only ever do this however when the situation is dire. Then flow stops and its only when all of a sudden I realize I haven't sampled it is ages, maybe days or weeks before I realized I'm parched and need the power and info and nutrition it gives me.

We have such an awesome God who belittles himself to communicate with us in a real and personal way. Why would I not want to take advantage of at and use the time he freely gives me to talk and grow in a personal relationship type conversation with the creator. sounds stupid but I do this most of the time. Oh, I'm tired or busy or some other ridiculous excuse. That's not going to cut it when I get to heaven... If my life is drained and I'm tired and acting grumpy I can guarantee why, my time with God is minimal or non existent. Dam my stupid humanity that pushes against God at every turn, wanting me to fail and let the channel fill up with rubbish. I need a purge of my life and the prayer channel, a refocus on the important, the special and constant. Maybe a fast or moving to Europe... I need something to get me out of the same old life and excuses. Without God Im nothing, an empty shell with no meaning or direction.

Thanks
Tim