Like others I head back to work tomorrow. Not the most rewarding thing I do with my life but an essential part of being an adult, or so I'm told. I have a saying which comes out quite often.... It goes something like "when I grow up I'll get (insert object, activity or behavior)"... I guess it's my way of telling people that when I'm sorted and old and responsible, I will have that and that section of life will be in order. I like thinking that I'm still a big kid, but I don't really think I am, my life doesn't show this.
I stood there today while my father-in-law (if you know him don't tell him I told you) lay down in the sea, waves lashing at his face playing with my little girl. They played in the sand and talked about the waves, Lily mentioning with joy that "Poppy was with Lily" and both grinned as they relaxed together comfortable in their play connection. We were there for his 57th birthday today.
Playing with kids this way is fairly easy or most people who have had kids, with Lily I do it most days... But here is the kicker. The fun, innocence and excitement in small pleasures has left me. It's not about being irresponsible or childish it's about enjoying life and not takin yourself too seriously. I miss that. I brings a joy to life even though I return to work tomorrow and start back at the daily grind. It's makes a lunch break the opportunity for mischief or calling a friend, not just precious moments of 'me time' that get counted down till... Awe crap now I got to work some more....
I pray that I remember how to enjoy this life and precious people in it. I have forgotten and the remembering takes time... I'm only 28 so I have a few years left to work it out and "grow down"...
Tim
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